Retire Early Lifestyle
Retirement; like your parents, but way cooler

In 1991 Billy and Akaisha Kaderli retired at the age of 38. Now, into their 4th decade of this financially independent lifestyle, they invite you to take advantage of their wisdom and experience.

Life, Death, Change, Illness, Suffering, Loss...  It's a Mental Game -

My Intimate Journey with Cancer Part 12

Billy and Akaisha Kaderli

It’s a “mental game”

I wanted to give you a concept that Billy and I have found to be useful over the years. It is my hope that I will be able to communicate it clearly and usefully to you, and in doing so, you may find a level of personal freedom that you might not have known before.

When Billy and I were learning tennis from the tennis pro at our Resort in Mesa, AZ, a piece of advice that our instructor emphasized was that the game was won or lost between our ears first.

Sure, one needed to be physically fit, hydrated and focused, but he would bring up often that “the tennis ball doesn’t know the score.”

“the tennis ball doesn’t know the score.”

WE are the ones who bring the emotional baggage or lack of confidence with us to each point. WE are the ones who tell ourselves “I’m thirsty, I’m tired, I can’t do this, the other guy is a better player, the crowd favors him, not me.”

The tennis ball doesn’t give one whit.

Whether you put spin on your serve, run your opponent from side to side to wear them out or smack an overhead slam, the tennis ball just obeys your command.

It is neutral, but often, we are not.

Human challenges

Our approach to the challenges we as humans all face in Life makes the difference between satisfaction, fulfillment, achievement, disappointment or regret.

Billy’s home-made onion soup for Akaisha in bed

I moved to California in the early 1970s with $1,000, no promised job and only 1 friend who allowed me to stay in his woodside home until I could find my footing. Family and friends back home in Ohio tried their best to discourage me as they couldn’t visualize a life different than the one they were living.

And since they could not see anything differently for themselves, they couldn’t see my vision of a new life for me, either.

They wanted to be sure I knew there was no way I could move across country, find a job on my own without connections, and survive.

As for myself, I wanted a life of adventure, something extraordinary. I came from hearty survival stock - immigrants from Europe - and I knew I had what it took to make a go of it in unfamiliar surroundings.

How we describe circumstances to ourselves

When Billy was a young man, he worked in Michelin star restaurants in Cincinnati, Ohio.

There was “no way” this dishwasher, turned busboy, turned waiter, turned volunteer cook could ever impress the owners of the international restaurant he worked for… except that he did.

Billy never saw failure – he saw opportunity – and his work ethic and passion for his subject of high-quality cuisine inspired all those around him.

He had confidence, commitment and self-reliance and it paid off. He never once considered that he would bungle the situation. What he told himself – what happened between his ears -  laid the foundation for his many successes yet to come.

Your choice

When it comes to Life, Death, Change, Illness, Suffering, Loss…What we tell ourselves about these tests of Life that we all face - colors our experience.

I wish I could tell you that what I have been going through medically has been a breeze, but it hasn’t. I’m not going to lie to you. There have been days of pain and I have to monitor “what goes on between my ears” when those days try to shake my foundation.

But on the other hand, the rising up of devoted Friends and our Faithful Readers have blessed my days and have humbled me with their prayers and expressions of love.

I don’t know how it’s all going to shake out.

I’ve never died before.

But I do know that I’m going to give this my best shot.

And like so many things that Billy and I have gone through - we’re not going to have someone else define it for us.

Retire Early Lifestyle appeals to a different kind of person – the person who prizes their independence, values their time, and who doesn’t want to mindlessly follow the crowd.

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