Retire Early Lifestyle
Retirement; like your parents, but way cooler

In 1991 Billy and Akaisha Kaderli retired at the age of 38. Now, into their 4th decade of this financially independent lifestyle, they invite you to take advantage of their wisdom and experience.

The Buffalo Story

And obtaining in-home care in Mexico - My Intimate Journey with Cancer Part 11

As you know, Billy and I are facing brand new territory in our retirement.

A sudden and unexpected downturn in my health has placed us in the position of major lifestyle changes – truly something we did not expect to encounter until years down the road… And to be honest, we anticipated a smoother ride.  

But here we are, a previously active spouse who now requires home care for basic needs, and our travel schedule has been placed on the shelf.

Who woulda thunk?

Two years ago, we were in Paris, one year ago we were in the Caribbean, and this year we are facing life and death matters.  

Outpouring of encouragement and the Buffalo Story    

We have received tremendous support from all over the world from our Readers for which words cannot express our full gratitude.

We received this short story below of the Buffalo from a family member, who says it reminds her of our approach to life.

It is as follows:

American Bison

“Bison instinctively know that the fastest way through the storm is to face it head-on. Bison are the only animal that turn into a snowstorm rather than away from it; because they instinctively know that walking into the storm will get them out of the storm quicker. There may be a life lesson for all of us humans.”

Billy and I have taken our challenges head on. In our writings, we say things like “there is no room for Fear” or that we don’t want Fear to rule our lives. 

The minute panic starts to creep in, we drop it and begin searching for answers. Billy likes to say he keeps turning over rocks until something useful turns up.

I don’t know how this current story of my life might “end,” but I do know that alarm or despair will not bring us what we want. We have to move forward into the storm so that we can leave that storm behind.

Finding in-home help in Chapala, Mexico

Living in Mexico offers us flexibility in how we solve various problems. Need something heavy to be carried up to our second-floor apartment? Just ask one of the carwash guys downstairs to do it, and 5 minutes and 50Pesos later both sides are happy.  

A few months before we left for Mesa last year, I utilized the help of an indigenous family who sells fruits and vegetables below our apartment. They are a household of 7 girls and a few boys and what I needed was simple. Go shopping with me, and carry my items back and up the steps. Go to the Laundromat with me, and carry my clothes. Pick them up the next day and carry them up to my door.

I paid them 30-to-60 Pesos a trip, which Esther accepted with wide-eyed pleasure.

Now, the in-home help part.

This can get a little tricky and I’ll tell you our story.

Esther is energetic, eager and honest. She learns quickly and I thought she’d be great for the morning in-apartment help I needed daily.

The thing is, her first loyalty is to her family business downstairs.

That works if I don’t need my groceries immediately or if she drops off my laundry and brings it back the next day.

But to show up daily at 7:30 to cut up fruit for our morning breakfast, empty out the trash cans and sweep our apartment was too much of a commitment for her. Some days she’d show up at noon, other days not at all.

She was a great “employee” just not for this position.

So, we put the news out on the taco telegraph that we needed a consistent morning worker. That same afternoon, our housekeeper came to us and said her daughter, Monje, wanted more work and would like to try this job. As a bonus, she had been studying at the local nursing school, so this would be right up her alley.

We said “Awesome. Have her show up tomorrow morning at 7:30am.”

At this point we wanted someone 4 days a week and we were paying her 75 pesos each day she came. (Just over $4USD currently)

She turned out to be excellent; Sweet, dutiful, kind, eager-to-please and she had a wonderful attitude.

This arrangement worked very well for the 2 weeks that we had her. But one morning she told us it would be her last day of helping us because “all of a sudden” her aunt wanted Monje to come into her store earlier each day to check in the deliveries.

Once again, family came first, and we were out an excellent employee.

Disappointment but not despair

At this point we told ourselves “Something better will show up. It has to.”

We managed on our own for a few days, and I kept telling Billy that this situation would not last long. A better fit is on the way. We could hardly imagine someone who could be better than Monje, but then we discovered Lori.

We have known Lori for years. A beautiful middle-aged woman with grown children, she’s our landlord’s housekeeper. She’s clean, responsible, intelligent, and she has her own transport.

When she stopped by our apartment to speak to us, we explained what we needed and she was amenable to the agreement; 500 Pesos for the week, paid on Saturdays. (About $28+USD currently)

Lori showed up on time, and cheerfully cut the fruit and readied me for my shower. After drying me off, she would then help to dress me for the day, and would bring my breakfast to me in bed. Daily, I would give her a short shopping list and some money, and when she returned to the house, the last thing she would do would be massage my legs to prevent blood clots.

Sunset over Lake Chapala

WHAAAT?! Again?

One morning Lori told us that she would have to quit because another woman for whom she worked “all of a sudden” wanted her to come to her house in the middle of the shift when she was working at our place.

Heeeeyyyyyy ….

I started to notice a pattern going on here, and I didn’t enjoy the direction the pattern was heading.

We had to make a move and make it quickly.

Billy spoke to Lori in the kitchen while he cooked breakfast and Lori prepared fruit. Lori had mentioned several times recently how prices of food had risen, and how she could not afford to purchase her items in “El Centro Plaza”. She waited until Mondays when the tiangis gathered down by the school and futbol field, and that’s when she went shopping. “The prices are better.” She’d say.

She was already saving us 37% on cartons of 30 eggs, and she would willingly go from shop to shop to find good quality but better priced items for us.

Billy understood the pressure of feeding her household of 5 adults as prices rose, so he offered to double her salary.

“Stay and we’ll pay you 1,000Pesos per week ($58USD). We need you, we want you here to take care of Akaisha.”

Lori’s eyes widened and she said she’d think about it. The money would come in handy and she made a point to tell us that she loved working for us.

The maid wars

As I mentioned earlier, this is a delicate situation. People cannot be “stealing maids” right and left, there has to be some kind of respect between employees and employers… and even employers and employers.

Why did this Gringa – out of the blue – want to have Lori show up 45 minutes earlier when for 3 years the hours had been set without change?

Something smelled “fishy” here, and I have seen this set of circumstances happen before.

People tend to get possessive about their household help and instead of cooperating they throw a wrench into what was previously working just fine.

I had to do something

The house became quiet as Billy, Lori and I were thinking of how this situation should best be handled.

For myself, I decided I would “beg and cry.” What did I have to lose?

Lori and I get along very well, so when I say “beg and cry” – yes, I did exactly that… but with a big sense of humor as well.

I got out my Google translate and proceeded with my plan.

“Lori, Lori, I need you to work for me. I can’t do these things myself, and you are perfect for this job. What kind of work do you do for this Gringa? Can you work for us for an hour and a half and we can split the difference with your other employer?”

“I do housework,” she said.

“Oh.”

Well, with that answer I felt like I had an ace up my sleeve. I mean, doing general housework isn’t rocket science, so what was going on here?

Ok, so you can think what you will, but this is when I went in for the kill.

“Lori,…” I said quietly. “This job is not forever. I’m dying. I don’t know when it will happen, but when it does, then you can go back to this Gringa and work any hours she wants you to."

Then I let out a theatrical cry, with a smile on my face. “Boooo Hoooo! Waaaaahhh!” Which broke the tension.

She laughed, I laughed, and I just said, “think about it Lori. We’d love to have to work for us.”

The rest of the morning all 3 of us were quiet as we contemplated what might come from these discussions.

The next day

So, the next morning, Lori came in very seriously and told Billy she could not accept the 1,000 pesos because it was “too much. It’s a lot of money. I will work for you for 800 Pesos per week, and we both will split the difference.”

There you have it.

Somehow, she worked it out with the Gringa, and it seems everyone is happy.

Things to keep in mind

It’s important to respect our household help, treating them with appreciation and dignity. They are looking for dependable work, and we are looking for honest, authentic employees.

For myself, I try to mix in humor because the Mexican culture is so much fun, and they love to engage. If you keep yourself flexible when working with the locals, you will find good pricing for quality work.

While our needs will likely change over time, this is what we are paying and for the services listed.

Picking up and dropping off my laundry – one way 30 Pesos or $1.75USD

Lori - light housekeeping, helping me getting dressed and undressed, drying me off after my shower, light shopping, cutting our breakfast fruit, massaging my legs, working 2 hours a day, 6 days a week - 800 Pesos week or $46USD

Up next… Going to the hospital in Guadalajara for medical procedures… It’s just another hotel room.

For more information, pricing and perspectives on my Stage Three Breast Cancer journey, click here 

Retire Early Lifestyle appeals to a different kind of person – the person who prizes their independence, values their time, and who doesn’t want to mindlessly follow the crowd.

HOME   Book Store

Retire Early Lifestyle Blog      About Billy & Akaisha Kaderli      Press     Contact     20 Questions     Preferred Links    

Retirement     Country Info     Retiree Interviews      Commentary     REL Videos