Retirement; like your parents, but way cooler
In 1991 Billy and Akaisha Kaderli retired at the age
of 38. Now, into their 4th decade of this
financially independent lifestyle, they invite you
to take advantage of their wisdom and experience.
The Rocks in My Basket
Carrying a Heavy Load
few months ago, I was enjoying a cappuccino with a girlfriend at a
cafe and catching up on each other’s lives.
“What have you been up to lately, Jo?” I asked eagerly.
“Rearranging the rocks in my basket” she said matter-of-factly.
have been to Jo’s home for fun, food, and holiday festivities. She has a
wonderful indoor-outdoor living style with a hand carved hot tub in her side
Curious, I asked her what she meant. Did she have a new rock garden in her
back yard? Has she been collecting some of the local semi-precious stones
nothing like that… Ever since Mom died my brother, his wife and I haven’t
been getting along. They are sure that Mom squirreled away a fortune and
they are spending theirs trying to find it. I’ve told them that there IS no
fortune, but they are convinced and they think I am lying to cover up.
“So… these are
the stones I
carry around in
my basket right
now. On the
other hand, I
was able to
forgive Mom for
the stunts she
pulled while I
was growing up,
so that’s a rock
I got rid of.”
chuckled together in mutual understanding and continued our visit.
Later on though, I couldn’t get out of my mind the image of carrying around
weighty psychological and emotional stones with me on a daily basis. In my
imagination I looked around my life and assessed the weight of my personal
thought of my middle sister who is disabled. Once vibrant, physically active
and sought after by headhunters in the business world, she now is wracked
with pain and struggles for reasons to get up in the morning; reasons to
continue living her life.
throw a few stones in my basket to show my solidarity with her. (Is this
effort to strengthen my relationship with my niece, who is going through a
difficult divorce, backfired. I reviewed a few circumstances in the past and
realized that perhaps they are not yet fully resolved. Add another rock.
watch the news to keep informed, and even though it upsets me, I’m glued to
the talking heads anyway. And even though I cannot change anything, I throw
in another rock.
of these incidents contribute stones, rocks, pebbles, and boulders to my
Lord. What am I carrying around?
are we to do about this?
and I had discussed the current status of our baskets during our coffee
date. We both agreed that the reasons for the rocks change and that some
days the basket is lighter or heavier, depending.
Depending on what?
Depending on how we take care of ourselves, both physically and mentally.
Every time we
some yoga, read
learn a new
skill, let go of
the past, clear
the clutter in a
or any other
-- then rocks, pebbles,
big stones get
tossed out of
we get caught up in negative emotion of any sort - fear, anger, lack of
kindness, judgment of others, self-righteousness, mental darkness -- then weight
of various sizes gets placed back into our baskets.
Don’t despair. This is an ongoing life exercise. If our baskets are
completely clear, we are probably enlightened like a spiritual Monk Master.
If we have something in our baskets that we are carrying around, we are
probably still human.
think this image is useful to keep in mind, even if all we are doing is
rearranging the rocks in our basket. The idea that I might be able to rid
myself of some of these stones and pebbles feels hopeful to me.
issues are you carrying in your basket of rocks? What do you do for yourself
to lighten that basket up? Is it working? If not, don’t give up, lighten
About the Authors
Billy and Akaisha Kaderli are
recognized retirement experts and internationally published authors on
topics of finance, medical tourism and world travel. With the wealth of
information they share on their award winning website RetireEarlyLifestyle.com,
they have been helping people achieve their own retirement dreams since
1991. They wrote the popular books, The
Adventurer’s Guide to Early Retirement and Your
Retirement Dream IS Possible available on their website
Trending on Retire Early
Early Lifestyle appeals to a different
kind of person – the person who prizes their
independence, values their
time, and who doesn’t want to mindlessly
follow the crowd.
Retire Early Lifestyle Blog
About Billy & Akaisha